Reading the Book
by chocolate oreos me
Summary: Summary: What happens when the whole of Hogwarts is forced to read the Harry Potter books by Dolores Umbridge in an attempt to make everyone hate Harry Potter? Read to find out. (My story is better than the summary. I'm really bad at summaries.)


Summary: What happens when the whole of Hogwarts is forced to read the Harry Potter books by Dolores Umbridge in an attempt to make everyone hate Harry Potter? Read to find out. (My story is better than the summary. I suck at summaries.)

Dolores Umbridge was sitting on her fluffy pink cushion chair. She had all the indications of being a crazy old witch: she had a creepy love of pink (she put pink food coloring in her water) and an over obsession with cats (she owned 15 of them, all spray-painted pink, with the following names: Snugglywuggles, Cuchiwoochie, Kittypie, Sugarface, Pinkydoodle, Happykitty, Pinkerella, Pinkywow, Cuddlysnort, Captain Pinkypoo, Belladona, Nightpink and Chinaberry). She actually had 74 other cats, but Hogwarts would only let her bring 15 to the school. She had chosen these 15 because they were all a different shade of pink, and she thought that that was a nice variety of nice colors.

She put down the cat tutu she had been knitting for Kittypie, her very favorite cat. Kittypie had been displeased with Dolores after she had given a ball of bright pink yarn to another cat, Nightpink, and therefore decided to knit more clothing for formal occasions to give to her Kittypie. She needed Kittypie to know she was her favorite in the family. She quickly finished the tutu and moved on to a prettier, puffier ball gown, also for Kittypie, of course.

In the middle of knitting she heard a squawking sound outside, and saw a barn owl carrying a pink letter, which meant it was for her. She ripped the letter open and saw the following:

_Hello Ms. Umbridge,_

_I am trusting you with important information, concerning the Ministry's currently most watched wizard, Harry Potter. In order to let everyone see him as the person he really is, we must expose him and let people know his history with Mudbloods, his ignorance and foolishness, and his willingness to trust every word out of Dumbledore's mouth. We have included a package with books about him containing a truth that will let everyone see his uneducated upbringing and also humiliate him and cause distrust between him and his friends. This may seem unnecessary and rude of the Ministry to intrude his privacy in such a way. However, we cannot risk delaying this any further and need to get rid of all rumors and gossip about Voldemort returning, and therefore, we must get rid of the cause of these rumors: Harry Potter. By reading these books and spreading the knowledge that Harry Potter is no more than a young, normal boy with weaknesses and a foolish nature, people will no longer support him and believe him. Remember, the books in this book are all true fact and tell the real life story of Harry Potter. Be sure to remind people of that, and tell everyone you can about these books, perhaps even read the contents in the books out loud to the entire world._

_Sincerely,_

_The Ministry of Magic._

Dolores ripped open the package that had come with the letter and saw 4 books. Every one had a different name and a different label: the 1st one she saw had the letter 1, and said, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. She smirked. This had been the very opportunity she had wanted to get rid of Harry Potter and his lies, her chance to do justice to the world. She came up with a plan: she would go the Great Hall, and at breakfast time tomorrow, read the books out loud to every single student in Hogwarts. They would spread the news to their parents, who would spread it to the rest of the world. She pressed the intercom button, which had been charmed to make her voice heard within the whole school, and made an interesting announcement:

Hello, students of Hogwarts School of Wizardry and Magic! As you all know, I am Professor Dolores Umbridge. I am sure you all know of a particular student, Harry James Potter. As it is of the Ministry of Magic's best interests, we will read 4 books containing his life story to the whole school, tomorrow, at the Great Hall. Attending is mandatory for every single student. That will be all, goodbye!She ended the last sentence with a flourish.

Harry, meanwhile, was in the middle of Transfiguration class with Professor McGonagall, along with the smart Ravenclaws. When his name was mentioned, everyone just stared at him, surprised. They had no idea why they had to hear his 'life story' tomorrow. Harry blushed. Then what Professor Umbridge had just said sunk into his brain: **We will read 4 books containing his life story. **What did that even mean? They would take away his privacy and all his memories and just share it with everyone? A typical thing for the Ministry of Magic to do. He grabbed his books and stormed out of the classroom. There was someone he needed to talk to.

He ran as fast he could to the corridor that would lead him to Umbridge's office, then flung open the door. "What are you gonna do?" He yelled, storming in the classroom. He was frustrated and angry; everything had already been taken away from him. Why couldn't he at least keep his personal experiences, that belonged to him? Umbridge didn't answer, and just kept sitting there on her fluffy pink chair, not answering, while Harry took 3 long, deep breaths and began to calm himself down. He knew he should at least be calm and listen to what was going on.

"Ahem, ahem, Potter!" Umbridge said in her high, squeaky voice. "I must say, it is a pleasure to finally have you in my office!" She bobbed her head. "However…" She smiled, in a way she probably thought seemed warm and loving, but just seemed creepy to everyone else. "I must intrude on your privacy, a bit, I'm afraid. For the good of the wizarding world, we will read aloud 4 detailed books about every important in your life. This is for everyone's good, though, to know all they can about you. You understand right, Potter?" Harry understood. It meant she was going to do exactly what he thought: intrude his privacy, take away every personal moment he had ever had, and tell the whole school about it. Everyone would know.

As he was thinking, he heard her dreadful voice come out of her mouth again: "But… for rudely barging into my office, Harry Potter, detention with my special quill." She held the pink quill up.

**I'm a new writer, so please, please PLEASE cut me some slack. I will worship you if you review. If I get ONE review, I will start to write the next chapter and upload it ASAP. That's how desperate I am. I'll work for a single review. PLEASE!**


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